Let's get the Aussie language lesson out of the way first. Tight-arsed means stingy or financial frugal. It's an expression usually used to insult someone, like "he's such a tight arse he throws money like a man with no arms", that sort of endearing thing.
I have previously briefly mentioned the financial gymnastics it has taken to get us all back to France. In fact getting here was easy - we flew back on the return leg of the tickets we moved back to Australia on last December. To date I have spent no more than the cost of the rental car to convey us to our house here in Souillac. No flights. No accommodation costs. Of course the really financial feat will occur when I get around to booking our seven tickets home. I'm just waiting for prices to come down a little, and by my reckoning that's going to be, what, May?
So things are tight. Cuts have had to be made. Hell, last night The Man finished the half glass of wine I'd left, just so it wouldn't go to waste. Trooper. Talk about taking one for the team. Unfortunately I had only left the room momentarily to make a phone call. The Man's thoughtful gesture therefore actually necessitated the opening of another bottle, but as they say, it's the thought that counts.
So under the circumstances its needless to say that when a mate of Curly told us he could hook us up with a FREE Christmas tree we were on board.
The tree hunting spot was just near an old quarry. For a reason known only to those who possess the Y chromosome The Man and our tree source scaled the loose shale wall, leaving an avalanche in their wake. The rest of us walked 20 meters back up the road and approached from level ground.
Tree selected, our mate got straight to work.
We were well pleased. The tree looked GREAT. All green, and piney smelling. And BIG. It was HUGE!
Missy let off some celebratory shots with Animal's air riffle, and we took our tree home.
And that's where things came a little unstuck. Whilst it looked fantastic in the forest, the tree looks decidedly under impressive in the house. How did I not note that sparsity? The lack of any branching on which to hang ornaments? And despite my not inconsiderable efforts, it would seem no amount of paper chains and origami stars will lift it from its tragic state.
Missy described the conditions aptly when she cried "Mum, now it just looks like a scrappy tree that you have chucked a heap of stuff on."
Sounds like Christmas to me.
|Despite it's sparsity the tree is very large - so large that you can only sit down one end of the couch and successfully view the television. \|